It was a long passionate kiss planted across his lips. And left there. For Audrey to see. ‘So she saw me like that?’ Eddie asked. ‘Yes, Dad,’ Beth said quietly. Jeff let out a sob. ‘Oh,’ Eddie said. He was calm, placid, as he thought. Suddenly fury rose inside his chest, tunneling upward like bunched fists. ‘I didn’t deserve this!’ he shouted as he rocked his bed back and forth, causing a bright urgent metallic clatter. ‘I did not deserve this!’ He felt a hand on his shoulder. ‘No one said you did,’ a stranger’s voice told him. Everyone was grim-faced yet Eddie heard laughter pealing inside his brain — mocking bitter hateful smug satisfied –and the laughing kept on and kept on and kept on. ‘Stop it!’ he shrieked. ‘Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!’ *** Home was as hollow as the hospital. Eddie was placed in the couch-turned-daybed in the den and he went in and out of pain broken up by a narcotic-laden sleep. Attendants turned him and helped him to the toilet and brought him food. Oh, the. I crept downstairs and covered Carls still figure in the blanket and then looked for the remote to turn off the tv. As the room plunged into darkness Carl asked “aren’t you forgetting something?” I nearly jumped out of my skin and Carl reached out to me touching my leg, “sorry I didn’t mean to frighten you but I didn’t want you to leave without it”. “What do you mean” I asked and Carl smiled at me then reached for my hand and pulled me onto the couch he was still laid on. It was then I realised that he wasn’t drunk at all and began to wonder what he was sleeping on our uncomfortable sofa for when he was perfectly capable of making it home. I was quickly snapped out of my thoughts as he produced my pink rabbit from under the cushion and said “this”. I was mortified and didn’t know where to look. I wanted to bolt from the room but at the same time I didn’t want to leave him behind with my toy in his hands. “Dont be embarrassed, I think its fantastic that you know how to please.
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