She had set up the lighting and tripod for her Nikon camera before I arrived. The set in the studio is pretty sparse. A hard wooden bench in one spot, a soft white leather sofa, a few chairs in assorted styles, and a partition behind which I guess her other things are. “I like my photos to be simple,” she says to me, answering my unasked question, “but don’t worry, we will do a wide range.” She starts taking photos of me fully dressed against a white background, “these are test shots,” she tells me, “so I can see how you are in front of the camera and what your best angles are.” She instructs me to do a few poses and I follow her instructions a little hesitantly. “Now start slowly undressing,” she tells me, “imagine you are doing it to tease a lover.” I slowly remove my heels one by one, letting them drop out of my hands with a clang. Then I start pulling the hem of my dress up, revealing my creamy white thighs inch by inch. I imagine doing it for Alex, a guy I’ve had a crush. "He's the one who picked me, and he coached me through it, in advance I mean. As far as that goes, he was going to die anyway, so what'd he have to lose? And I thought I was dreaming the whole thing, I wasn't exactly awake to be judging whether it was wise." I guess... ," she said, still dubiously. "He has more control than he told me, doesn't he?"I shook my head again. "I don't think so. He got me when I was sleeping and encouraged me to see it all as a dream to make it easier for him to persuade me. But it was still persuasion, not command. And in the end it wasn't something I wouldn't have done voluntarily, fully awake, if I'd recognized how important it was." You'd have cut him open and sewed him up?" she demanded incredulously."To save his life, yes," I answered. "He reminded me that night that he'd 'done me a service, ' that was the way he put it. He meant showing me about my singing. And he asked would I do him one. He says that's the way his, well, his people work it with.
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