I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the Beep. If I do not return your call, You are one of the changes.” Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.He shoots his friend and kills him.Wife says “If you continue to behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends!” My wife and I had words,But I didn’t get to use mine. Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses. The irony of life is that, by the time You’re old enough to know your way around, you’re not going anywhere. I was always taught to respect my elders,But it keeps getting harder to find one. What’s the difference between stress, tension and panic?Stress is when your wife is pregnant,Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant,and Panic is when both are pregnant. Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?*Kid: Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack & our gardener ran away.(*Period: As in. I guess I may have to be a lesbian like you were, then... Hey, I don't seem to mind the idea of making love with a girl with this body. Of course that may change when I encounter a real girl like your girlfriend. Is she good looking???" He felt pleasant twinges at the tips of his new breasts thinking about it. "God, I have to get out of this body before I go crazy." He walked over to the couch and sat down, taking off the high heels Jane had been wearing. "Good lord!" He exclaimed to Jane. "I just realized I walked around the stage and over to this room wearing these silly high heeled shoes of yours and had no problems walking in them. James put them back on and stood up. He started walking, and then running around the room, even dancing a few dance steps. "They hurt my feet a little but it's like I was born walking in them!" Jane saw her own reflection in the mirror as James passed by it. She saw an attractive man staring back at her who was wearing a flashy magician's costume with.
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