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Softly, she added, "Maybe?" I caught her eyes and said, "No worries. I meant that as a joke. What were you hoping I could do for you?" She took a moment to recompose herself. "What I would like is for you to look at me. Tell me what you see. Tell me what you were seeing earlier that you liked, but also things that you don't like." Her earnest expression almost broke me, and I almost allowed myself to answer right away. Instead, I stated, "I have always suspected that women are trained from birth to ask men loaded questions." I softened the accusation with a smile. She looked crestfallen. I allowed myself to fall a little into that trap. I reached out and lifted her chin up so she had to look at me. "Let me know when you never want to hear me speak again," I suggested. "Let me start with what I have seen before today. Because my schedule varies, I have only seen you at the gym a handful of times. You get along well with the night manager and you two both smile when you talk to each. I sat behind a blue Chevy at the intersection. My mind was in turmoil and I was driving more by habit than anything else. The light turned green, so I followed the Chevy through the intersection.At least I started to follow it. I remember seeing something from the left corner of my eye. Then the dreams, the nightmares, the hallucinations, the pain, and the misery became my constant companions. I remember seeing my family, I think. I remember people talking to me. It's funny that I could understand each word, but the words didn't make any sense collectively. They were just words, nothing more.Everything ran together, like I was jumping from one dream, or nightmare, to the next. I never felt like I was awake, or lucid. Eventually, a part of me realized it wasn't real, that my world at present was simply a place in my mind. It didn't stop the pain, or the nightmares, but it did lessen the misery.I opened my eyes. This was different. I could see walls and a ceiling. I could hear a voice.
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