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I dropped the wallet on the ground, and he dropped his eyes to the ground. His pistol moved away as he reached down. It was then that I zapped him with a fifty dollar stun gun. It was one of the better zappers. I kicked his pistol away.“Pick up that gun,” I said to Tonya as I opened the folding baton, which had also been hiding in what I called my Captain Kangaroo vest.The thug was coming around. “I ought to kill you,” I said to him quietly, “but I’m curious. What was your message for me?”He looked up at me and even at Tonya holding his gun and said, “Go home cracker,” he said.“Just those quiet words,” I suggested.“Rough you up a little maybe,” he said.“You mean like this,” I said striking a quick blow to his face. I was pretty sure there was the sounds of bones crunching. To make sure he remember me, I hit him one more time to his right clavicle. In other words he was going to be in some pain for a while.The worst thing was I had an audience for the whole thing. While he sat on the. Aren’t we going to talk about this?”“It says eighty-two percent!”“Yeah! That’s on a computer! It simulates shit! This is reality. It doesn’t take into consideration the guy who committed suicide!”“Yes, it does! I plugged it in. You don’t like him because he has a bigger-““A bigger, what?”“Derrick, isn’t that the reason why husbands have other men fuck their wives because they have bigger dicks?”“Bigger dicks, yes! Not so the husband can commit suicide!”“That’s one sob story out of all the other ones we heard! Even the husbands that don’t like him approve of him. Some of their wives are still having sex with him.”“What about some of the other candidates? I’m sure there are some.”“We haven’t gotten a hit in a while, and we’ve been going over this all summer long. I’m excited to try this, aren’t you?”Truth be told, I was. My wife, former model and registered nurse, had a chance to have sex with someone else, and give us a push into swinging.“But the guy who killed himself.”“They lived.
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