The doctor comes in and says, “Ah, I see you’ve regained consciousness. Now you probably won’t remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You’re going to be okay--you’ll walk again and everything. However, your penis was severed in the accident, and we couldn’t find it.”The man groans, but the doctor goes on, “You have $9,000 in insurance compensation coming, and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don’t come cheap. It’s roughly $1000 an inch.”The man perks up.“So,” the doctor says, “You must decide how many inches you want. But I understand that you have been married for over thirty years, and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now, she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before, and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It’s important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision.”The man agrees to talk. But what hereally wanted for now was just to talk to him. To find out what the lifeof a sexual anachronism had been like for someone else. He hoped the guywould be willing to go back to the house with him, and wouldn't (as hehad so crudely signalled) want to do it right here, in the swiftanonymous manner of certain gay men, like the statues of famousRepublican congressmen having sex in the bushes by the bathroom inPalomita Park.The kid stood facing him, smiling in the cool greenish light filteringdown through the treetops. With that huge bag dangling alongside his leghe reminded Tim of an old clouded photograp, of some brawny but sweet-souled young immigrant back around 1910, who had just stepped off theboat after making his way steerage-class from Europe, holding histattered suitcase and smiling to beat the band over the promise of lifein America, this "new world" with all its possibilities..."I've waited my whole life for this," said the young man in a voicechoked with emotion.Tim.
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