Your husband?" He faced clouded with concern. "There was no accident. There was no husband. That was a lie. I told you that to hide ... what is really going on. That - " a very deep breath was taken and exhaled. My habit or Melinda's habit, it didn't matter, I wanted a smoke, "that I am not what I appear to be. I am a boy. A kind of young one at that. There you have it."Several expressions rolled across his face to be quickly swept aside by another. Disappointment, however, cropped up most often. "I'm not gay. I get this, because of the whole ... actor model thing, but I'm not gay." He was now examining me with the eye of expert jeweler looking for flaws in a diamond. I could clearly see he was suppressing a sense of alarm."I know. I don't know why I asked you to stay for a drink. Not that it matters, but you don't seem gay. And I wasn't doing this because I wanted something from you. I just needed a person to sit and have a drink with.And you've always been nice to me. You can. . well take Jack: how long would he expect a high-status girl to stay with him?”“Like Alice? Not long. I think she just tried him, kind of thing. Once.”“Okay...”Faye thought about it. “I suppose, if he makes her have less status, she might stay longer?”“Exactly. If he sees himself as low status.”“He wasn’t very nice.”“No. So calling you a slut, and using you, was about him, wasn’t it? His feelings of being inadequate. Not about you. And then because he’s big and aggressive he influenced the others, who’re quite young and perhaps not especially strong characters.”“They could never have done that to Alice though.”“You’re a different person to Alice. You can’t be someone you’re not. You’re gentler and less confident and you always will be. You have to work within that. So if you can’t scare them off, what can you do?”“Leave, I suppose. But I didn’t have anywhere.”“You understand about self-image? Self-esteem?”“Vaguely.”“Everyone depends on the people around them for their opinion of.
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