I looked up at the doctors and there expressions more than their words told me what I knew to be true. She was gone. My Rebekka Rose was gone. I had lost them both. Never would I see her beautiful eyes, or his through hers. Never would I hear her laugh or watch her grow up. Never would I see her first steps or hear her first word. Never would I get to teach her what she needed to know, never would I get to hold her again and know that she was mine. Never would I have the chance to tell her of her father, never would I get the chance to show her the world. I just held her tight to my chest as my mom tried to hold me. I couldn’t cry at first. I was in shock. It was when I looked down at her tiny face, and she looked like she was only sleeping, laying so peacefully in my arms did I crack. I started to cry, which I think relieved everyone, but then I couldn’t stop crying. I was crying for Rebekka Rose, I was crying for the father she never knew, and the man who never had the chance to. .. COLD! So cold... I've changed my mind, even my new fake life as AmberFoyle is better then this. The currant is strong, it's sweeping me intothe middle... nobody is hearing my cries... of course not, it's two in themorning, everyone is either asleep, out clubbing or out misbehaving.Cold... can't swim, can't move... I'm sinking... can't breath...strange... it's so peaceful down here, and I should... rest, sleep... TryTo Be or Not To Be. I chose not to be... must sleep... Sergeant Howard of the Metropolitan Police sat at his desk with a diary infront of him, a pink diary with a heart on the front that had obviouslybelonged to Amber Foyle, the young woman who had been pulled from theThames. It had been found on the ground at what must have been the spotwhere she had jumped. Such a pity really, that such a good-looking girl(good looking before spending three days decaying in the Thames anyway)should become just another suicide. Perhaps her diary would tell him whyshe killed himself..
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