Hot and sticky, I thought again of having that shower. Maybe that would help me feel a little fresher, and maybe it would while away some time before the evening came, hopefully bringing some cool air on the breeze.‘Bleugh.’ I stood up and went back inside, upstairs to get into the shower.6Whatever was on TV finished. I hadn’t been paying attention, and only really knew it had finished because of the closing music. I turned it off. Wasn’t in the mood for any more.I looked toward the back again, thinking of going outside to sit for a while. It was nice when it was hot, and if I was going to drift for a while I wanted to do it in the Sun.When I went out again, I checked quickly over the fence. He wasn’t there. I couldn’t help feeling a little disappointed, even though I’d felt a little exposed before. Maybe now I just accepted that he might see me, where I’d been taken unawares before. Or maybe now I just wanted him to see me again... even though I was dressed.I couldn’t say why I was. A breeze of mild, tangy air blew in. When I raised myself on the stack of soft pillows, the lower part of the window revealed the sea, a darker blue than the sky above it, specked with white sails, busy and calm, endless, eternal, soothing ... Her hand, gently, pushed me down again. “Three days of mourning,” she said, “three days for me to recover in solitude from the shock of my father’s sudden death from heart attack. Three days before I have to take up my duties as the Queen, and begin to console his subjects, my subjects now, for their tragic loss.” She smiled. “Three days in which to succumb to my grief, undisturbed...” She half bent over me, the tip of the index finger of her left hand trailed the thin red line down from my throat, slowly, unstoppably, not that for all in the world I would have wanted it to stop. I almost winced when she reached my clitoris, not from pain but from remembered pain, not from the shallow cut from her knife, but from the agony of the awl. A scar.
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