‘Yes I did, I mean do. Why does that matter?’ He laughed a cruel, menacing laugh. ‘Do we really have to do this now Nick?’ Jared asked firmly. ‘What better time to do it than now?’ Nick replied. My stomach flipped in fear. ‘You owe me £1.5 million by the end of the year.’ I stood opened mouthed at the two of them. Jared had his head ducked in shame while Nick had a smug smile on his face. ‘Why? Why do I have this debt?’ I nervously asked. ‘Well, your coked up sister took a loan from me of £800,000 but then when the interest grew over a number of years and the fact she took a number of smaller loans over those years the amount grew. When she killed herself, which I must say was a very selfish act on her part, the debt was transferred to a relative. That relative is you.’ I could feel a mixture of anger and desperation well up inside me. There was no way I would be able to make the money by living the way I was. I earned no money from the bakery job but earned a reasonable salary. . SYSTEMS LAWS & RULESIf Architects built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.Any Given program, once running, is obsolete.If a test program functions perfectly, all subsequent systems will malfunctionIf a program is useful, it will have to be changed corollary:If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.All programs expand to fill available memory corollary:All programs expand beyond the ability of the programmer to understand them.Interchangeable files won’tRegardless of the units used by the customer, the programmer shall use his own arbitrary units, convertible only by means of weird & unnatural conversion factors. Speed, for example, will be expressed as furlongs per fortnight.Files that cannot be destroyed will be.Investment in reliability will increase until it exceeds the cost of errors, or until someone insists that work be done.A carelessly planned program takes 4 times longer to complete.
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