I busted my ass to do what she wanted.The next Saturday it was back to the library. I was in luck! They'd just gotten in a recently published college textbook on DE. I snatched that thing up like it was made of gold. They also had an old, thick textbook on the five dollar table titled, "Mathematical Methods for Physicists". That sucker went into my backpack in a flash. Mom was surprised that I had finished so fast--usually I spent over four hours digging into the stacks. This time I'd skimmed off the cream. Since the new books could only be taken out for a week I'd have to drop it off at a satellite library within seven days. I was going to start powering through it as soon as I got home.I sat up on my bed with my new staff across the headboard. It stung me once in a while but I didn't mind. I felt comfortable with it close to me. I seemed to be able to sleep and concentrate better too.Three days later I finished the book. It was like I'd been swimming and came up for air. I realized. I can't believe my thinking now. I can't believe you will understand, but there was no love such as between you and I. There was sexual pleasure, but again nothing like we, you and I normally indulge ourselves."Early leaned forward in his chair and looking directly into Susans eyes he asked "What were the rewards Susan, power, money, prestige? A bigger office with your name on the door? I don't know how much worth those things have for you but let me ask you a question; are they worth our marriage?" If the sum total value of all of the rewards, including making your "friend" feel better, could be put in a box and offered to you in exchange for your marriage, your husband and your home, would you have taken it?"Susan visibly flinched at Early's question "No, of course not when you put it that way. I can't imagine my life without you in it." Then maybe you should try to imagine it, that's the price you are very, very close to paying."Susan reacted to Early's last comment with a.
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