Phone calls in her presence about setting up a long fishing trip, reservations made, tickets purchased for a flight to a well known fly fishing lodge, calls returned from fishing buddy that I was not home to take... messages heard, and saved for me. I covered every angle, thought of all things that could go wrong, and made adjustments to keep the plan in effect. The day arrived, I called a cab to take me to the airport, even checked in for my flight, and asked the ticket agent to notify me if my wife called to verify that I made my flight! She did! I had a strange thing happen at the news of her call... I became quite aroused, knowing she would soon be with her lover, and quite possibly, in my own home! I dialed our number, and, when she answered, turned on a recording of a telemarketer.... oh fuck! I knew she was home! I rushed out to the cab stand, jumped in a cab for the return home, all the way, my strange excitement increasing, my cock actually oozing precum enough to make a wet. It is a law of nature that the gender which does not use or need a product, or is most likely embarrassed by its purchase (I am long over that, at least), is the gender which must buy it."What do you need?" It wouldn't embarrass me. I'd get her to be specific; plugs or pads, regular or maxi, normal or super-absorbent, scented or unscented, wings or strings. My last SO used to rip the end off the last box and hand it to me. It's harder to screw that up and nothing to explain."There is no chocolate in the house." This was delivered in an aggrieved tone. It must be my fault (if true, which it was not.) She was a chocoholic, and that involved rule 9: "Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous? A. Because no one wants to quit." That turns out not to be the case," I replied. I'd read in some Heinlein novel, or maybe a Tom Clancy, that this was the correct way to say "Wrong!" politely. I knew The Rules. I also knew where all of the secret stashes were."Would you care to.
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