“Stop it,” she muttered to herself softly, “He’s gone. He’s gone and been gone almost a year, and you’re stronger than this. He made you stronger than this.” Yet strong as she was, grief still found her at times. Though her heart tried hard to hold the man’s memory in fondness and happiness, the wound of his loss was simply too deep and personal for her to ignore. She was healing, true, healing in the fashion of a wound slowly scarring over, hard and twisted and ugly. She hated it. Hated this world that left her without him. Even worse, she hated herself. For despite the keenness of the loss, her body would not cease tormenting her. The Stirring continued on, as undeniable and impossible to ignore as ever. She’d resisted for awhile, but it wasn’t to last. She gave up fighting her nature some months ago. Her proclivity for seeking out different men to sate her needs was less than secret now and though she had come to terms with it and accepted it, neither was she entirely proud of it.. Up until now I spent all of my summers in a different country bored out of my mind. This year though, I protested, I wanted to stay home and be with my friends for the summer. My parents did not like this idea. They thought leaving me home alone all summer would be a mistake and they did not trust me that much. So I talked to my best friend Carrie's parents and they agreed that I could spend the summer with them. My parents were still not sure about it but they finally agreed and let me stay with her for the summer. I was excited, I was finally free for an entire summer. Three weeks had gone by and I was having an excellent summer, minus the fact that Carrie's parents were a little on the strict side. We had to be home by ten o’clock and we had to constantly call and check in. I had always made fun of Carrie for calling her parents and checking in all the time but now I just felt bad for her. I hated having to do this checking in crap. Being as I was constantly checking in and I was.
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