She dictated it and ordered me to sign. Even though knowing it could severely embarrassed me if in the wrong hands, my immediate worry was about another lashing if I didn't. I had no fight left in me. With a broken will, I signed.Vick and my wife were watching as I placed my signature on the embarrassing note. They both smiled as I sheepishly submitted to mother's abject demands, which included reading the signed note aloud. In it she also had a sentence which read "I fully understand and accept that my wife and her black lover or lovers will determine when I am to have sexual relief, and then only through masturbation when they grant me their permission. I enjoy beating my meat and therefore am glad they care enough for me to be controlled so that it won't affect my health." See I told you he was a mama's boy." Spoke mother as she held the note up toward Vick and my wife.Every since Vick moved in, his masculinity and manliness were so great compared to me. As a result, I quickly. He was soothing my back, tightening his embrace, I knew I was drenching his shirt, I tried to pull away, but Ethan didn’t let me. ‘Shhh, let it go Emma, it’s okay to cry.’ After what seemed like an eternity, I finally stopped crying. Talking to Ethan made me feel like a weight was lifted from my shoulders, I didn’t have to carry this burden alone anymore. I was exhausted, emotionally and physically, Ethan was holding me, and for the first time, in a very long time, I felt safe. ‘Thank you.’ I whispered, I didn’t know what else to say. Ethan kissed the top of my head and whispered, ‘My pleasure, I know you probably heard it a thousand times, but it wasn’t your fault that your parents died that night. It was an accident.’ Deep down, I probably knew he was right, but the feeling of guilt I had was stronger. I pulled away just enough so I could look into his eyes. ‘Maybe you are right Ethan, maybe it was an accident, but for the past five years, everyday there’s a ‘What if…’ inside.
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