Then, she turned cold and started being rather snippy when I came by the campus library one evening to use the public-access computers. something about the log-in information. it’s now what she said, it’s how she said it. And today, when I went to help my friend Barry with his work, she also behaved coldly toward me and was snippy about the log-in information again. what gives? Is this woman a sociopath? A misandrist? I pride myself on being a good judge of character. I’ve locked horns with abusive women in the college before. I just never thought Bernadine would be one of them. Unfortunately, she is.I guess she’s a villain. Like Samuel L. Jackson said in Unbreakable, villains always recognize heroes when they see them. And like true pretenders, they hate the real thing. I think she’s jealous of my abilities and my success… What should I do? The only thing I can do. Warn people about her. There are many folks on the college campus who think she’s the nicest person in the world. Yet. I get rid of her, it takes effort. I am Dan. It is difficult to be a woman. Dan doesn’t like that. But sometimes I am her, I feel her pain. I wish, oh I wish I was just Dan all the time. I live each day inside me, I never know for sure who will be me on any day or moment. I live in a world no one can know, I live in a world of thinking and being in a way no one can undertstand, I also do not, it is just the way it is. Time gave me this, trapped gave me this. So I write. I write all the time. I have to. If I did not, then the real world around me would come, I would die. I don’t want to die, yet I do. I could die by myself for myself, I just can’t go to that dark corner of nothing and be, that would make me die. So I live, I write, it gives me legs, it gives me love, freedom. Reality is not a good place for me. By writing, I can be anyone, anything, go anywhere, love anyone. I can be normal. Yes, I am trapped. I am trapped inside my mind and I let it out by writing, I have nothing.
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