Realising mom was right and my new found maxim that I will never argue with a topless chick, I undid the strings on my shorts and let it fall to the ground. The boner which was now only covered in my wet transparent white cotton boxers stood firmly tented. I have a fairly large dick and it was about 75% erect. Embarrassed, I looked sheepishly at the ground a mumbled an apology to mom. Being innocent and naive, she mistook my apology as meaning the honey spillage and not my rude boner. “Honey you have to take off the boxers as well. Otherwise we are going to get stung around your pee pee area” Said mom in her most innocent motherly tone. She still hadn’t registered the boner or if she had, she chose to ignore it. I slowly pulled down my boxers which were stuck to my groin and hurt slightly as I peeled it off. As the 10 inches of my now hard boner came into view mom realised for the first time that I was erect. “Mom I’m sorry it’s like this…. It’s just the honey…. It ….” I stammered.. "Nationality?" asks the immigration officer."German," she replies."Occupation?"No, just here for a few days."As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Parking Officer's funeral, a voice from inside screams:"I'm not dead, I'm not dead. Let me out!"The Vicar smiles, leans forward, sucking air through his teeth and mutters,"Too late, mate, the paperwork's already done."I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night.Or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the missus were going to commit suicide together yesterday.Strangely enough, however, once she killed herself I started to feel a lot better.So I thought - sod it, I'll soldier on.I woke up this morning at 8 and could sense something was wrong.I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing! I panicked. I didn't know what to do.Then I remembered – the local cafe serve breakfast until 11.30."Jesus Loves You."Nice to hear in.
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