I stop inside the foyer and put her shoes in the closet, and then see her purse and shawl in the middle of the floor. “Yeah she’s drunk,” I say out loud to myself, she is only messy when she gets trashed. I put her purse on the table, her shawl on the appropriate hook and turn all the lights off as I head up to the bedroom. I walk into the bathroom to do the nightly prep work, seeing her dress on the floor, and the toilet unflushed. I finish brushing my teeth, flush the toilet, and throw her dress in the hamper. As I walk to the bedroom, the door sticks like something is blocking the way. I get nervous, thinking maybe she has passed out, and push hard on the door. Looking in the gap I made, I see that she has opened a drawer in the nightstand. I squeeze my arm in and close the drawer, finally able to get the door to open. As I walk in the bedroom, I get one of the greater shocks of my life. Lying on the bed, my lushes’ sex goddess is working a rather large vibrator in and out of. ’ She crossed her eyes and bared her teeth in a comedic grimace, clawing the air with her free hand. Todd almost stepped back, feeling a momentary, thoughtless revulsion. She laughed at his resulting expression. ‘It was an auto accident, 15 years ago. We’d just flown back from our honeymoon in the Caymans, and were heading home from the airport. A man cut us off on a curve and Carl lost control in the rain and we slid sideways into the guardrail. It was the guardrail that did this to me, surprisingly. Somehow we hit it just right and the rail peeled up like a banana skin and punched right through my window. Since we were going backwards at the time, you’d think it would get the left side of my face rather than the right side. Not that it really matters, though, right?’ The question, the entire explanation, had a well-worn and practiced quality to it. Todd wondered how many times she had allayed a new acquaintance’s discomfort with this easy demeanor and matter of fact storytelling..
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