I'm supposed to believe that you didn't have your fingers in their cunts?" Jenny," I sighed. "That right there is why we are done. Yes, there was a woman in my room when you called me in San Francisco. I had gone out there because my uncle had a heart attack. No other member of the family could get free that fast. When you called, my aunt was resting in the room while I grabbed a quick shower before we returned to the hospital. She's still happily married to my uncle. As for the supplier visit, Justin surprised me when he told me that his wife had cooked a special meal for me. The voices you heard were Justin's two daughters and his wife. His wife dotes on him and would never stray. His daughters are both teenagers and love to try out flirting, but I'd never do anything. The whole reason I made that trip is that Justin refuses to meet with Bill because of his reputation." So you admit that Bill has affairs," Jenny hissed.I looked at Jenny for a moment and shrugged. "I never knew I. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, the blood rushing in my ears. Then somehow I knew that I had to embrace this rage, make it mine like I had the pain.I saw the front of my mother's home blowing outward in a rain of beige stucco, chicken wire, twisted stumps of wood and flying, burning insulation. Inside I saw the fire caress the flesh I had loved, all in slow motion. I saw my family burn and die.The rage washed through me, I owned it, made it mine, tucked it away in a corner of my heart for future use. I stood up and looked around, I needed to apologize to Marco.And so it went. I learned to deflect emotions. That was his lesson. And it was my first lesson. He took me through pain, rage, sadness, guilt, embarrassment, the whole range of emotions that could be used to cripple me, stop me. I learned to own them, let them pass through me without eating my soul or mind.The next lesson was equally fun. One day, when I was working on training nine prairie dogs to stand on their.
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