I wrote on the note, " I thought I was hallucinating when I saw that it was you on the stage. Fuck yes I will come to the private booth. I have fantasized about you too. You have a great body. I love your tits and your cunt is just plain sizzling hot." I shoved the note back to her. She read it and grinned then winked and licked her lips with her mouth open.I zipped up my pants and walked around the adult store looking at merchandise, but buying nothing. Finally it was several minutes before her time in the private booth. I walked into the room where the man stands for the show which is behind plexiglass. What is nice about the private show is that there is a phone on the wall so you can talk to the woman on the other side of the glass and pay for a private show. I always liked to buy the fantasy show. That cost more, but the women I usually met there did love to talk about fantasies and about real things.There are hooks on the wall. I always undress completely, except. The rough patch that he referred to had been the death of my girlfriend and her little brother in a massive accident that I was involved in. A drunk had ran a red light and slammed into our Honda Accord and totaled it. Miraculously I had not been hurt much more than a few bruises and a shit load of mental anguish. My girlfriend’s brother died instantly. She, however, had not been so lucky. I sat there with her as she cried in my lap. I had never felt so powerless in my life. What the fuck had I done to deserve this? What had she done? What had her brother done? I had no answers. As I tried to move on with my life I realized I could not focus on the real world anymore. What had been there for me was not there anymore. After the accident, I had somehow lost my ability to socialize. I couldn’t talk to people. I couldn’t be around people. And I thought I had escaped the accident whole. How arrogant of me. I thought about suicide, but realized I couldn’t do that to myself. No matter how.
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