‘No.’ She got up and walked away, leaving me feeling like an asshole. That encounter made me not want to go back there, so Cindy and I limited our being together to places outside of the café. I knew there was still something that drew me to Lily when I saw her, but she was always completely closed off to me and I decided that the best thing was to continue to be with Cindy. All the great sex was taking my mind off everything else. My mother was doing well and my shoulder was responding well to the physical therapy. The more I took physical therapy the more I knew that part of the recruiting process for them was to ensure that they were masochists. Lily, however, was still something of a paradox. She was a beautiful woman and the great sex we had that one night had really enthralled me, but ever since she had been cold and unapproachable. She had told me she wanted nothing to do with me. Cindy, meanwhile, was turning out to be amazingly good company, an intelligent woman on many. Today I am self binding myself as you requested. Firstly I attached a pair of police cuffs that has a long piece of chain attached to the centre link. I fixed it to one of the post loops so they hung down to around my shoulder height as if I was kneeling. Next I got the police leg irons and padlocked the centre of the chain to a low fixed post loop on the same side as the hand cuffs. I prepared a piece of carpet, rolling it up so it was 4 foot long and 12” round. I used duct tape to hold the carpet in a roll. I tied this roll of carpet to the post on the opposite side of the cuffs. I used a slip knot so that when untied will cause the roll to fall vertically down.About 20 mins before my husband was due to arrive home I got myself ready. I got out our large ring gag and put it on. This one when place in position behind my teeth holds my mouth wide apart, it’s uncomfortable but works extremely well. I knelt down in front of the post so that I was on the opposite side from the cuffs. I.
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