I guess it?s not a baby I?m takingcare of today?" She smiled. "Cute look... Why not eighteen though?" Dad already paid for the ski rentals?"She laughed. "I guess I can hang out with my kid sister all day today."We spent the next couple days on the slopes, with me enjoying not beinga total baby! I even spent a couple evenings hanging out as myeighteen-year-old self. Unfortunately, it was clear everyone was a lotmore comfortable with me being my ?normal? self.Christmas Eve, Santa Claus was set up at the ski resort with realreindeer all around him. We waited in line for way too long, with Lilyand I dressed in velvet Christmas dresses and thick white tights.Finally, after what seemed forever for us, Lily was on his lap tellinghim what she wanted for Christmas. Once she had her picture taken, Iwas added to Santa?s lap too, and joined her for a picture, beforebeing left on my own."What do you want for Christmas little girl?" he cooed.I looked at him. "I think I actually have everything. "Ruth began screaming in terror, or even pain. I turned to her, and sheclambered across the chair arms onto my lap and wrapped her arms aroundme, and continued crying and screaming into my chest, while I pattedher back."What have you done with Ruth?!" exclaimed Ma, as she got up and triedto take Ruth in her arms.Ruth clung to me all the harder, as Grandmother answered, "Ruth's nine-year-old girl mind remembers anew the horrifying interrogationexperienced by seventeen-year-old Peter in jail." She tapped Ma on theshoulder. "Mrs. Cuttington, there's a reason Ruth is clinging to Lukefor comfort, and not you. Let her be." Ma," I said, "You didn't give a damn about her horrifying experiencesbefore." I tried to hold back my tears. I wasn't concerned aboutpunishment or retaliation for cursing this time. In fact, I wasitching for a fight; any attempt to punish me would result in a realversion of the confrontation Bikini Beach had fabricated Thursdaynight.Ma collapsed back into her.
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