Now that our youngest child’s gone to university, he’s telling me that he wants something more from me. He wants to do something kinky. I don’t know exactly what that might be – he hasn’t given me any details – but I can guess. He said that he’d like to try something new. He didn’t use the word kinky – he used the words experiment and different and out of the ordinary – but I know what he means. He means kinky. And I know what kind of kinky stuff he likes. I caught him once, two or three years ago, looking at some porn on the Internet. When I came into the basement, he couldn’t get the screen turned off fast enough and I caught a glimpse of a woman tied up with rope and leather straps. That might be the kind of thing that he wants but I know that it’s not the kind of thing that I want. Simple, ordinary sex is good enough for me. Get in, get out, and get to sleep. That’s what gave us two fine children and a good home to raise them in. We don’t need a lot of foolishness to be happy.. .. Kathy regained her composure enough to ask in the most sarcastic tone she could muster, “What did you do to win those? Fuck the most boys?”“There was more to it than that, dear.” Once again, that deliberate, matter-of-fact voice. “Number of times per boy, duration, and quality all came into it too. But yes. I got into the spirit of the occasion while I was there. I hope you will do the same.”“What’s with the canoe and the raft? It hasn’t even got a river or lake.”“They’re metaphors. You’ll figure them out easily enough.”“ ... EWW!”“You had better sit down, dear.”Kathy sat down across from her mother with an impressive display of skepticism.“They won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to do.” Julia waited until her daughter indicated she’d understood. “If you want, you can spend your entire time there without ever seeing a boy. I hear the library has a wide selection of books on religion.”“You mean, I can hang out with the lezzos?”“Yes. Nobody will tell you to do anything. In.
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