" I don't know, my stomach is just so gross to me I could never take my shirt off in front of someone." How many times do I have to say it, so many people think that is hot, besides your ass would just be too nice for any guy to resist." So gave me an odd look. "I'm sorry mom, was that out of line?" It is okay, I just had no idea my ass was that nice." She turned her head and looked at it over her shoulder. "Danny, it is just me and you here, no one else has to know your answer, just give it to me honestly. Are you attracted to me."I gave a long pause and finally admitted to it. "Yes, I know it is wrong and all, I just hope this does not make anything awkward." No it is faltering Danny, how about this, we all know I am a lonely 54 year old who has not gotten any action, and you are a horny 23 year old. How about if I show you my butt, you show me your dick." Mom, are you serious? Wouldn't that be inappropriate?" Has this whole conversation not been inappropriate?" She was right. "No. No hidden agendas, Lindsay.”“Nice! You made the effort. What would you like to know about me?”“Well, everything. You know? General stuff. Where you’re from, what did you do before, ever been married, any children, your ambitions, dreams, plans, any allergies, favorite color, do you want to have sex with me? Everyday chat stuff, like that...” Lindsay only paused a moment, then went on with making meringue battered fried EGGPLANT, sliced quarter inch thick.“That’s a lot of questions. Prioritizing them, one. No allergies except poison Ivy. Never married, three children by three different fathers. Raised on an East Texas ranch, an only girl with three brothers. Mama hated any chore she couldn’t do from horse back. So, I started cooking at an early age, trained by my old Grammy. Let’s see. My favorite color? Dollar bill green! Would this be a good time to discuss salary? Maybe I deserve a raise?”“Forgive my plagiarism, but it fits me so perfectly, I had to, stole the phrase from.
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