’3 ... He does not ‘GET LOST ALL THE TIME’ - He ‘INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.’4. He is not ‘BALDING’ - He is in ‘FOLLICLE REGRESSION.’5. He does not act like a’TOTAL ASS’- He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.’(Loved this one!)6. It’s not his’CRACK’you see hanging out of his pants - It’s ‘TROUSER CLEAVAGE.’This is likely a repeat but it is worth a re-read“As good as this bar is,” said the Scotsman, “I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow, there’s a wee place called McTavish’s.The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he’ll buy the fifth drink.”“Well, Angus,” said the Englishman, “at my local pub in London, the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two.”“Ahhh, dat’s nothin’,” said the Irishman, “back home in me favourite pub, the moment you set foot in the place, they’ll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like, actually. Then, when you’ve had enough drinks, they’ll take you. "She moved slowly, keeping her arms across her ample chest."Bend over and grab your ankles, I want to see your tits swing." She did as she was told. "Now, I want to see that pretty little pussy. Take those shorts off."She hesitated, which earned her a hard slap slap across her breast. She screamed into the gag and hurried to get her shorts off."Now, take that position again, but turn around."He stared at her pussy and exposed anus before shoving her onto the floor."Stay perfectly still! I'll beat you if you move!" She knew he meant it.He spread her legs with his hands until she was almost in a split position. He started to finger her pussy while he spread her ass cheeks open wide."You have a pretty anus, too. I can't wait to hurt it." He smacked her left ass cheek as he spoke, then the right one. She screamed into the gag and tried to move away from his hand."I didn't tell you to move!" He lifted her up and laid her on the bed, on her stomach. He sat on the edge and pulled her over.
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