‘Yeah, I think your notes would be a good start. Would you mind if I took them home with me tonight? Or copies of them?’ ‘Sure, I trust you to take the originals.’ ‘Sounds good,’ she responded absently, her focus on a photocopied article that lay to the right of her arm about traditional Japanese marriages. David fidgeted, deciding it was time to segue into more casual conversation. ‘So, Chase was your professor?’ ‘Actually,’ she admitted, ‘I never did take any of his classes.’ ‘Oh? Then how did you meet? Was he your advisor?’ ‘Ah…’ Maggie’s cheeks went hot with embarrassment. This flush of color was not lost on David. ‘We dated. Briefly. I was meeting with another anthropology professor. She was late, his office was next door, and he struck up a conversation with me.’ Maggie stopped short and blushed anew. ‘Oh, and it was a long time ago, too. My freshman year. Before Mrs. Abbot. Right before her, actually.’ ‘Mrs. Abbot is my ex-wife,’ David blurted. He felt the bite of jealousy. Now pain. I wet myself. I was so ashamed. My room smelled of my piss. I didn’t smell it, but I knew, once someone else opened my door, they would. I hoped nobody would find me. Why wouldn’t this go away?I could feel my stomach eating itself. I was so hungry. My mouth was so dry. What little water I had in my body, my head now laid in. I hate drooling. I began crying. I was so pathetic. I was alone. Hours passed.Hours of thinking, watching my life play out in my head, all my regrets. I didn’t care about sex anymore. Fuck sex! I just wanted Camryn. I wanted her then. I wanted her to hold me. Tell me that everything was ok. Hug me, kiss me. Make my damn pain go away. Fuck my penis, I hated it! It was the one that got me into this mess. If I just let my mind control my body and not my penis, I could be sleeping now. No pain. Wake up in the morning and go over to see her. Watch TV. Talk with her. Laugh with her. Touch her skin; just her hand would be the.
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