”“That great!” says the frog. “So what’s the bad news?”“Well, you’re going to meet her in Biology class.”✧ ✧ ✧A woman’s on vacation and calls homeShe asks her husband, “How’s my cat doing?”The husband says, “The cat’s dead.”The woman’s upset and says, “Well, you could have broken the news to me when I got home. I can’t enjoy my vacation now. You could have just said a little white lie, like the cat’s on the roof and you can’t get her down.”“Okay, I’m sorry,” says the husband, “I’ll remember that.”The woman says, “Anyway, how’s my mother doing?”The husband says, “Your mother’s on the roof and we can’t get her down.”✧ ✧ ✧What do you get when you cross a whore with a computer??A fucking know it all✧ ✧ ✧Good HeavensThe teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.---The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories.There were all the regular types of stuff: Spilled milk and pennies saved.. Hey, I’m going to have a harem of kitties someday,’ Rebecca chimed in, trying to diffuse what she knew was going to become yet another argument between her friends. No one was listening. ‘A calico, for sure, a siamese and-‘ ‘What’s so wrong with harems?’ Emily said. ‘It’s a pretty standard sorta wish-fullfilment kind of romantic drama. Weren’t you all into those awful teen drama Dusk books back in the day? And didn’t you force us all to watch your Vampire Crusader anime?’ ‘It’s not the same at all,’ Chloe said icily. ‘Harems perpetuate this rotten culture that teaches men that it’s okay to collect women. It shows women that their lives center around impressing and servicing a man, or being discarded on that man’s whim. It implies that one man is worth many women, and nothing could be further from the truth.’ Chloe clapped her hands together in amusement, chuckling. ‘In fact, you think Brian is talking to girls right now? Ha! A hundred bucks says Brian holes himself up in his hotel.
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