A lot. Relationships scared her, but not having Aren in her life scared her more. She would be ok for a day and not think about him too much, then the next day it would hit her like a freight train. She would think she was strong and that she was fine without him, then she would start to think how much her life would suck if he weren’t in it. The little doubts about his affections disturbed her greatly. She had always been independent and the presence or lack of a man in her life had never bothered her one way or another. She wanted it to stay like that, damn it. Maybe Aren isn’t like all the other guys I’ve been around. Maybe he really isn’t the jackass I thought he was. A girl can hope, right? * * * Gin was awoken abruptly from an unusually deep sleep. Someone was banging on her front door. ‘What the hell? It’s like three in the morning,’ she muttered as she drug herself out of bed. She padded to the door in running shorts and a cami. She knew she had the world’s worst bed-head. He knew better, however.He parked his car in the lot and took a deep breath, then got out andsmoothed his skirt. He pulled his security badge from his purse as heentered the building. Out of nervousness he kept his head down and wavedthe pass in front of the card reader; which beeped and cleared him forcertain floors in the building. No one paid him any attention as heentered the elevator. As his friends had said - everyone was concernedwith their own business. He walked to his desk and tossed his nameplateinto the bottom drawer with his purse, then concentrated on assembling themorning packet that he always had ready when Mrs. Rogers arrived. Oncethat was done he went to retrieve a cup of coffee. Sarah and Monica werethere and looked him over, "Very nice, Cheryl. Are you ok?"His heart fluttered and his stomach was turning flip-flops, "Yeah, this isme diving into the deep end." He arrived back at his desk just as thephone rang and Mrs. Rogers walked in. He stopped writing long enough.
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