Some people went to drugs and some to liquor. Me I went to Country Store. Working on it was excellent therapy. I expect that is why I never wanted it to end. I knew at heart, if I ever broke out and allowed myself to take that first drink, I would just follow the bottle into the trash.The one thing that prison did for me was it dried me out. After my time in the joint all the drugs and liquor was purged from my body. I hurt often and needed to escape, but I found ways to escape which weren't so self-destructive. The prison psychologist would be proud of me. He called it the grand substitution. For me it was a man, a woman or a dildo. Well not always, sometimes it was just looking at pictures of Country Store before I put my hand to it. So I guess you could say I found my release in some of the same things Roland had. He could never know that, but it was true nonetheless.I put another log on the fire and realized why all the stoves at Church Camp were wood. The act of keeping the fire. I smiled at the thoughts of her tied down as I had my way with her.I was also lucky - her room was a few doors down from mine. I knew by what was happening that she was going back alone. Her friends were less snobby than her and found a couple of guys to slip away with. But Heather was not having any of that - she would go back to her room by herself and shake her head at her friends.Finally I saw her slip away and refuse a couple of offers to be escorted back to her room. I slipped away first and went to my room. I stood outside the door pretending to find my key. I heard her shoes make a soft scuffing sound as she came down the dimly lighted pathway. When I heard her get closer, I slumped against the door and moaned softly like I was sick.She stopped and I could tell that she was appraising the situation. Did she want to help me or ignore me. I decided to move things along.I half-turned to her and said softly, "Could you help me?" What's wrong?" she asked hesitantly."I-I get this.
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