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I wrote to Gina less, but she seemed to understand that wrestling was important to me.I kept working out, and practicing, and eventually, things started to fall apart. At the time, I thought things were just fine, that I was doing well. When I got my semester report card, after the Christmas break, my parents were not pleased. I’d been working out and practicing so much that I’d let my schoolwork slide. I’d called Gina a couple of times, but I only took the time to write to her about once a week. I could tell she was getting a little upset about it (okay, maybe a lot upset), but if I wanted to be a good wrestler, I had to be serious about it. But it was my grades that put a match to the powder keg I’d turned my life into.Coach Simmons called me into his office one day after practice. I’d been winning most of my matches, and I’d even had to start watching my diet to stay below the two-pound-over limit for my 167-pound weight class, so I knew I was putting on muscle. I couldn’t imagine. Internally I wept as I consigned my fantasies about Dan and me to that list of fantasies that can never become reality – right alongside me becoming a pop star and me marrying a prince.By then it was about time for us to go and visit Bec. I helped Nana get dressed and then went to change my own clothes.I didn’t have anything to say as we drove to the hospital. It was Dan and Nana and Angie and me. I sat in the back beside Angie’s car seat and stared out the window without really taking any notice of what was out there. Oh yeah, and I was feeling twitchy.When we got to the pediatric psych unit, we found Bec in her room together with Mischa, her anorexic roommate.Bec was shut down but she latched onto Angie and Dan straight away. I had to laugh because there had been a problem with Bec’s pyjamas and Mischa had dressed Bec up in a set of micro shorts and a micro tube top. She was practically naked. It was an outfit like dance kids sometimes wear for dance practice – when they’re not.
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