One rainy day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband's car pull into the driveway.'Oh my God - Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window. My husband's home early!''I can't jump out the window. It's raining out there!''If my husband catches us in here, he'll kill us both!' she replied. 'He's got a hot temper and a gun, so the rain is the least of your problems!'So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs his clothes and jumps out the window! As he ran down the street in the pouring rain, he quickly discovered he had run right into the middle of the town's annual marathon, so he started running along beside the others, about 300 of them.Being naked, with his clothes tucked under his arm, he tried to blend in as best he could. After a little while a small group of runners who had been watching him with some curiosity, jogged closer.Do you always run in the nude?' one asked.'Oh yes!' he replied, gasping in air. 'It feels so wonderfully. You can tell your parents, brothers, sisters and all of your family that the reason they don't have the children or grandchildren in their family any more was because you are a cheating piece of shit. How is that for fun? Good memories, hey?If you contact the children or allow them to contact you, or any member of your family, the children will be dead to me. I will fire them from my firm, and disinherit them and their children. Further, they will no longer be allowed to meet with their half siblings, the men you fucked with for a quarter of a fucking century, they and you and your family are dead to them. There can be no compromise on this, or any other conditions I put in this letter.I am happy you are staying in that house because it has such good memories for you. Since it was all you got in the divorce it is good to know that you have your happy memories.You know what I remember best, when you had me get a vasectomy so I could never have children of my own; so that as the last.
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