’ I left the confessional and went to Mass, and later returned to my room, with a couple bottles of water. I prayed and thought. I thought about what I had done, about the love I had for Zack and of the love he had for me. I thought of the consequences of that love, leaving my vocation, becoming a wife and possibly even a mother. As I prayed and thought, the enormity of my decision began to overwhelm me. But, as I prayed, a sort of peace came over me. I knew that the Lord would guide me and that I would follow his path, no matter where it led. That evening as I sat reading my prayer book, my cell phone rang. I looked at the caller ID and saw that it was Zack. For as much as I wanted to pick up the phone and hear the voice of my beloved, I had given my word. I let it go to voice mail. I went to sleep that night at peace with the world. If the day of prayer and contemplation did anything, it just strengthened my decision to leave the Order and spend the rest of my life with my love…my. After work, I stopped at a driving range. I pulled a few of my clubs from my trunk and spent an hour smacking golf balls. I was frustrated at first, but I soon developed a rhythm and hit the ball pretty good. I could see where the improvements in equipment over the last twenty years would help my game. I stopped at a small diner and had a leisurely meal, then headed home. It was not even nine and I went to bed. Bonnie wasn't home, but I realized that she was probably in bed, with Shitwad. That was the last thought I remembered before it was time to get up and go to the gym. Bonnie was sleeping next to me, so she must have made it home at some point.That afternoon after work, I purchased a membership to a country club. Then I went out and played a round with another guy looking for some company. It was after eight when I got home and Bonnie was irritated."Why don't you tell me when you aren't coming home right after work, Brian?" she demanded. "Where do you go so early in the morning?".
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