Even now, at a point where she had greater mental claritythan she remembered having for months, stray thoughts whispered at herto just slip away and return to taking over Makar's empire or even tokill James in his sleep, so that she'd never have to feel like thisagain. Caring about someone only made her weaker.Thankfully those whispers were weak, but only because they were drownedout by emotion. Guilt and worry plagued her, two emotions that she hadbarely felt since she'd completed her transformation into Iona. Itmade her feel almost human, for once, an idea that her twisted thoughtsfound simultaneously desirable and revolting.The sound of footsteps in the hall tugged at Iona's attention. Theydidn't sound right. All of the nurses on duty, even the male ones,were quite light on their feet - undoubtedly to avoid waking sleepingpatients. She'd certainly never heard any of them clomp about in bootslike these people were doing.Rising from her seat, Iona shifted into her gaseous. " MaryHenderson said. "If Sylvia and I can't understand gender and sexualityissues, who can!" Brian Paterson chipped in: "I think I can speak forFiona as well as myself," he said. 'This is all very confusing andsomething of a shock. Of course we know that transgender people exist.Its just we never expected to meet one." Fiona nodded in agreement. "Areyou gay?" she enquired. "No I'm not," I replied; then paused. "At leastI didn't use to think so. I've had girlfriends in the past and have beenin love. It is true I am not in a relationship at present, but it is noteasy to find a girl who will understand about my need to dress. I haveto confess that recently, as I have started to go out in public as'Caroline', I have enjoyed the attention shown to me by men. But I'venot been attracted to anyone sexually in that way." Well, Fiona and I both applaud your bravery in coming out into the openlike this," Brian responded. "I think we need time to digest what youhave told us, so we too will go.
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