. Medicare pays $43 of it.This one is compliments of JerryYou Know You Are In A Redneck Church If... ... people ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5,000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em. ... when the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering," five guys and two women stand up. ... opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday. ... A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of." ... The congregation of 500 members only has seven last names in the church directory. ... people think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy. ... the baptismal pool is a #2 galvanized washtub. ... the collection plates are hubcaps from a '56 Chevy. ... instead of bells, you are called to service by a duck call. ... the minister and his wife drive matching pickup trucks. ... the communion wine is Boone's. ” Maegan just looked at her and then at the cleaning things in her hands, as if to escape from her mother-in-law’s angry stare. The older woman pressed her advantage, stood up and then it happened. She shouted at Maegan, ‘Look at me girl,” and SLAPPPPP.., Maegan’s left cheek exploded in sudden fire. Before she could utter a word Victoria shouted again, ”How dare you behave like this,” and SLAPPPPP, the other cheek. The cleaning things fell to the floor as Maegan’s hands flew to protect and sooth her cheeks and she opened her mouth as if to scream a protest but again her mother-in-law took the initiative and told her to pick the things up and, ‘Clean that filthy shelf this instant.” Maegan did and it was only later she would realise that a point of no return had been passed in that moment. Oh God, why had she left that chat active, she should have guessed it would have been her at the door. You idiot Maegan. Now what would happen? Victoria put the kettle on as her daughter-in-law.
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