“Get a room!!!†yelled Adam, one of my oldest mates. “Fuck off Asshole†I snapped back laughing, “but i think he might be right, we can’t do anything in front of all these people†I said to her. Laughing she said “I agree, I don’t want my first time to be in front of all these people†. I was stumped, here I thought she was already well experienced and I started getting nervous. “I think we should go to my place, I know my parents aren’t home, and if they are well, we’ll just go downstairs†she told me with that perfect smile of hers. I agreed and we made our way back to her place, catching a lift with a friend. I was so excited I was hard all the way back, which was about a 10 minute ride. Finally!!! We made it to her place; we thank him and made our way inside. We noticed her parents car outside and the first thing that went through my head was “fucking hell, how dare they spoil this for me†hahaha I looked at her and she just told me to be. For UU’s, it’s YMMV (Your Mileage May Vary).There was a terrible car accident. A woman was lying in the street, covered in blood. Someone in the crowd shouted, “Call a priest!”The woman opened her eyes and said, “I’m a Unitarian.”“Then call a math teacher!”HOW MANY (xxxxxx) DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?Anglicans: 8. One to call the electrician and 7 to say how much they liked the old one better.Charismatics: Only one. Hands are already in the air.Lutherans: Change?!?!?!?!?!Mennonites: At least 15. One to change the bulb and 3 or 4 committees to approve the change. Oh, and a casserole.Mormons: 5. One man to change the bulb and 4 wives to tell him how to do it.Pentecostals: 10. One to change the bulb and 9 to pray against the spirit of darkness.Presbyterians: None. God has predestined when the lights will go on and off.Roman Catholics: None. They use candles.Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favour of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in.
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