The first nights the thought crept in I calmed myself by thinking my odds were one in twelve, amazingly small, all things considered. Only I couldn’t shake the feeling. Then one night I remembered. Snake eyes. I rolled snake eyes. It would only make sense that such an unlucky roll of the dice would condemn a woman. But that seemed crazy. I wasn’t superstitious. I tried so hard to remember when my last period was. I needed to know when to expect the next one. But I couldn’t remember. I use a period tracking app on my phone, and without even a calendar I couldn’t land on date. I just prayed every night that I would be greeted by my menses the next morning. Sadly my period never arrived. Then I noticed some of the smallest of signs. The first one happened during the final week of my marriage. My husband came home and gave me a big hug. No big deal. But my breasts. They hurt. My breasts had a twinge of pain from the embrace. Something I had never experienced before. For the first. Her mind silently told her ‘go on little man, do your worst, I can`t stop you can I, I am yours now, not Rob`s or even my own, I am your puppet and I don’t even know your name, it was strange, it was exciting, and it was happening. He reached behind her back nimbly unclipping the bra, her breasts fell loose, spilling as only mature breasts can spilling onto the waiting tray, her head fell forward as far as it could, restricted by the throat strap, eyes on his hands and flicking to her breasts, knowing he was about to cause her and them, extreme pain, but feeling indifferent, unable to care, distant, it was a strange but very exciting feeling, just waiting. Janice had removed the bra , she was handing the little man a piece of 4x2 wood, it was as if she knew every move he was about to make, her gentle fingers caressed those nipples, her touch soft, gentle then griping and lifting as he slid the wood into place, the breasts laying back on the wood, nipples peeping over the front edge,.
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