“I’ve taken care of everything, dear, don’t worry. Everything will be fine,” I said as our cab pulled up in front of our house. But as it turns out, there was one thing I had forgotten * When we got home ten days later, the wife was absolutely exhausted and I was kind of beat myself. The trip back had been the plane ride from hell. There was one delay after another, missed connections, lost luggage and host of other little indignities that all added up to one big pain in the ass. Tanya was sitting on the couch with Buckshot in her lap, scratching his ears and watching a football game. That dog looked happier than I think I’ve ever seen him before. The wife excused herself to go upstairs and take a shower as Tanya rose to greet us. “Did you two get along okay?” I asked. “Oh, sure, everything was just fine,” Tanya said. “Buckshot’s a sweetheart, and I let him sleep in the bed with me. I hope you don’t mind.” I certainly didn’t. Lucky bastard. Tanya excused herself to go get her. He had approached Rites of Eros with an extremely specific shopping list that went so far as to include dress and foot sizes. He was looking for someone quite petite, and it happened that I came close to the size and build he was after. Then he had picked my picture out of all the ones Maxine had shown him.So here was the deal! He dropped off a dress and a pair of high heel shoes at the Rites of Eros office. He also dropped off a wig, a short blond pageboy. I was to put all that on (stuffing all of my very long brown hair into the wig somehow) and drive to his nice American neighborhood at an appointed time in the middle of the afternoon. My name, by the way, was to be Debbie. I was to arrive, then use my phone to call my lover, Tyrone (he had to be called Tyrone, just as I had to be Debbie), to invite him to come over. A big black guy, you understand.Then “Tyrone” and I would repair to the master bedroom and fuck each other’s brains out while Neil emerged from hiding to watch us. I.
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