‘I want to marry her.’ Jeff chuckled. ‘Have you told her yet?’ I shook my head. ‘No. It just hasn’t seemed like the right time. Every time I think it is the right time, I…I…’ ‘You get cold feet?’ ‘Yea.’ Jeff just nodded, ‘That’s understandable. It took me almost a year to get up the courage to ask JoAnne to marry me.’ I looked over at the older man, ‘really?’ Jeff nodded. ‘It’s natural to be afraid of commitment.’ I bristled. ‘It has nothing to do with being afraid of commitment. I love Crystal. I love John…’ ‘But?’ Jeff prodded gently. The answer to that question brought up two questions. I wasn’t sure which one to ask first. Finally the words just slipped out of my mouth. ‘Do you think I’m a good father?’ Jeff looked at me as if he had never seen me before. ‘What?’ ‘Do you think I’m a good father?’ He must have seen how much his answer meant to me because he was quiet for a moment. Then his words weren’t exactly what I had been expecting. ‘Do you love him? Does he seem to accept. We had left our base about 2 weeks ago and were pretty sure that our CO had gotten us lost in the ranges due to the fucker never paying attention. Finally we decided to strap down for the rest of the day in a small valley and pitch tent. It wasn't long after that the guys were back to their typical conversations of what they missed most about home....fast food, A/C, a bed, cellphones, alcohol...and then of course sex, girlfriends and wives...at which point I retreated to my tent in the hopes of not becoming anyone's "muse", especially the three over zealous horndogs of the bunch; McKinley, Ford, and Gilvarry. Big mistake on my part.I had been trying my best to not spend too much time shooting the shit with the guys since the stupid mail prank last month. I guess they got bored (and stupid) and thought it would be some fun at my expense but it didn't turn out that way. Instead they read out loud the entire letter from my boyfriend describing how brutally he was going to fuck me when I.
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