..... NOTHING! The damned thingwouldn't start! I popped the hood, lifted it and looked inside. Not thatI could do anything, I wouldn't know a carbeurator from a fluxcapicitor!I stood there in total panic! I didn't have the money for a tow, oreven a cab home, living 35 miles away. Then a very masculine voice said"Having problems honey?" I jumped in surprise, but recognized the voiceas one of the regulars of the ABS, Steve, a man I had often had thepleasure of blowing."Let me have a look," he said as he grabbed me by the waist and shiftedme out of the way. His hand slid casually across my bottom as he let mego. I stood by nervously as Steve fiddled under the hood."Try it now," he said, confidently, as I slid behind the wheel andturned the key. Thankfully, the engine started, humming along as usual.I jumped out of the car to thank him, as he closed the hood."Just a loose battery terminal, you might want to get it looked at," hesaid smiling. I asked him if I could give him some money,. ‘How do you make it moist?’ I asked. ‘Oil,’ was the reply. ‘Coconut.’ ‘I use butter,’ I texted. ‘That would work too,’ Cathy said. ‘But if you’re really good you don’t need to use anything,’ I continued. We kept going back and forth with vaguely veiled food analogies for a while, discussing spices, pie and whip cream and how variety keeps things interesting. ‘Just all this talk of food is making me big,’ I texted. It was but it wasn’t my already slightly pudgy stomach I was really referring too. Something else was getting a bit larger while we continued to chat. ‘Why not chow down?’ asked Cathy. I didn’t respond, not knowing exactly what she meant. The course of the conversation changed for a few minutes as we talked about how sore we were from work and about Cathy’s trips to her massage therapist, her RMT. In one line of text, her phone’s autocorrect feature changed ‘RMT’ to ‘TNT’. ‘Dynamite?’ I texted. ‘Yep, rub it and it explodes.’ This wasn’t at all like me, and I was afraid.
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