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The thing was, the house was great, but it also came with memories I don’t need, so I’d been looking off and on. I was a commercial real estate agent, but you hear things; I’d seen several developments with apartments attached. There was a really nice three-bedroom executive suite apartment with roof rights, in a new development in downtown Bellevue I’d been keeping an eye on. It would suit me down to the ground – or the roof, in this case -, and I could afford to lease it for a couple of years, with intent to buy.In lots of ways, it was better that way. I had more resources to draw on than Jeff did, and while I was pissed off with him, turfing him out and keeping the house, well, that would just mean large amounts of alimony, and I didn’t want that, either. And I wasn’t that much of a bitch.I wasn’t. Really, I wasn’t. I wasn’t cheating on him, although god knows, I had the opportunity. And it wasn’t like it hadn’t crossed my mind.I loved my kids. I know I’m not putting my best face. You didn't expect them to be permanent and you weren't emotionally involved. You weren't disappointed too much when they ended.The same with the johns. Those relationships were very temporary: you met, you fucked, you parted. Simple. No complications. No emotional involvement. June could cope with that. There was no new pain when the relationship ended.Sometimes there was pain, easy pain. June couldn't hurt herself, they were watching her too closely for that, but she could get someone else to hurt her. The other girls talked about what to look for, the danger signals, when a guy came through the door. When she needed some easy pain, she'd go with one of the dangerous ones. She knew which buttons to press to get what she wanted. Sometimes it was difficult to judge. If she pushed him – or occasionally her – too far she'd end up in a med-tube, which was no good at all. That fixed everything so she didn't hurt. She needed the easy pain as a distraction. If the johns were hurting her,.
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