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“I hate you, bitch.”Washington, DC, back in the dayThat was pretty much the end of any contact between them until Raptor finished grad school and found her way to Washington, DC. She wanted to put her MPA degree to good use, one of thousands of college graduates who figured a graduate degree in public administration would give them a leg up. Most were disappointed to find the real world of politics and bureaucracy and the collision between the two was not a pretty sight and one not really covered in their seminars or lectures. At least not in the whole glorious and awful full-color close-up that maneuvering in the overheated DC environment brought with it.The minority leader wasn’t the minority leader back then. Newly elected from a state known for its music and horses and coal, he was learning the ropes himself. His appearance didn’t help. Later in life he would be mistaken for a turtle, sort of, but even as a younger man he didn’t make any girl’s heart go pitter-patter.Raptor wasn’t. ’ Mac took the hint. After we had ‘made love’ as we were calling it now, Mac gave me his ultimatum. ‘So here’s the catch. You have to come to the pub with me Friday.’ ‘Well okay. That’s not a big deal.’ ‘Let me finish. You have to come as my girlfriend.’ ‘I can’t get out of it can I?’ ‘You either come as my girlfriend or we’re over. No more fighting and no more sex.’ ‘Deal.’ ‘You do realize that doesn’t mean that you just come as my girlfriend, you actually have to be my girlfriend.’ ‘Yes Mac. I understand.’ ‘So how does it feel not to be single for the first time ever?’ ‘It feels exactly the same. Exactly.’ ‘Maybe it’s because you’ve been with me this whole time.’ ‘Or because I’ve had a boyfriend for less than a minute.’ ‘I know what would make it seem more real.’ ‘What?’ ‘Let’s change our relationship status on facebook.’ I laughed hysterically. ‘You are 34 years old and the first thing you want to do is change your facebook?’ ‘Uh yeah. Oh come on, guys call you the ‘island’.
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