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I..." he blushed guiltily, "came to get some cokes."He wasn't fooling anyone with that line, he didn't realise that I had noticed long ago the way he shuffled the soft drinks around in the fridge to hide the fact that the odd can of beer went AWOL from time to time. I had no doubt that he had come to get some beers for himself and his friends, nor that he had not expected to find me in the kitchen." 'Uh' cokes eh?" I grinned at him deciding it was time to let him know I knew his secret, "More like a few cans of Stella young man."He went an even deeper shade of red, but said nothing; I don't think he knew what to say."Ted, Ted," I laughed, "if only you could see your face. Go on, get the beers and go back to your friends." You aren't mad?" he seemed to breathe with relief."No," I smiled, "I don't mind as long a you are sensible about your drinking. Now run along dear, your friends will think you've got lost."He grinned and headed for the fridge, taking three cans of beer he went to. "Burt did as he was told and picked up the pencil."I will not waste Lady Ann's time. I am nothing compared to her.' Go on.Hurry up."Burt scrutinised the paper, building an increasingly bad feeling aboutthis and then tried to write. He popped his tongue out the side of hismouth and wrote as carefully as he could but it took him well over aminute to get one line done.I wEEl KnoT wAYsT LADee ANNeS tYM I aM nUfFiNk cOmpAreD tOo ErrThe butler looked at what he'd done and sighed. "Oh for goodness sake!Stand up!" Don't you want me to write no more?" asked Burt, doing as he was told."I don't want to spend the rest of my day supervising an illiterateidiot who can't spell for toffee. You can just say it out loud." Out loud?" Two hundred times. Go on."Burt looked back at the butler and realized with quiet dread just whatthis could mean. If he said that over and over again then the repetitionwould work on his brain, just as it had before. It would push himfurther and further on in his.
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