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Asfar as Elaine and Julie were concerned, dad's crossdressing really washis idea. By reinforcing their belief, Celia had now succeeded in makingme not only a victim of the conspiracy but also complicit in it.By this time the six of us had wandered into the vestibule, where wefound several other residents shuffling about aimlessly. I was aware ofbeing watched as we slowly crossed towards the corridor."Well," said Celia, "we mustn't keep you any longer. Samantha will bewaiting for you. Give her my love, won't you?" And with that, she andher two companions sauntered off into the community room."What a nice old lady," Elaine commented as we reached the door of dad'sflat. "She certainly seems to have her wits about her." Yes," I agreed, with concealed ruefulness. "Doesn't she."Dad-- Samantha-- greeted us affectionately. He was wearing a royal blueplain cotton dress, thick brown tights and a pair of black kitten heels.A string of large fake pearl beads hung around his neck, and there. He was laid out in the coffin for friends and neighbours to pay their last respects.“He’s got a great tan,” Mrs Doolan from next door mused. “The holiday did him the world of good.”“And he looks so calm and serene,” said Mrs McGuiness.“That’s because he died in his sleep.” explained Mrs Murphy, “and he doesn’t know he’s dead yet, but when he wakes up, the shock will kill him!”“Your glass is empty O’Flaherty, will you be having another?”“And why would I be wanting two empty glasses?” replied O’Flaherty.Murphy arrived home late from the pub, well oiled and ready for trouble.“Is that you Murphy?” called his wife.“Byjasis! It damned well better be!”Two tough union men were working on a building site when Murphy fell from the second floor scaffolding.“Are ya dead?” cried Gallagher from above.“To be sure I am,” replied Murphy.“You are such a liar Murphy that I don’t know whether to believe you or not!” called Gallagher.“That proves I’m dead,” said Murphy’s voice from the rubble below,.
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