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You’ve experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in the toilet bowl.3. You can drive for four hours in one direction and never leave town4 You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.5. You know that “dry heat” is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door at 500 degrees.6. The four seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??-ORYou can retire to California where...1. You make over $450,000 and you still can’t afford to buy a house.2. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.3. You know how to eat an artichoke.4. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.5. The four seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud and Drought.-OR-You can retire to New York City where...1 You say “the city” and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.2. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but. “Thank you Bridget,” he smiled, “I was just wondering what to do about Christmas, and I had decided to try to find a hotel. But you’re closed over Christmas normally aren’t you?”“Yes, we are in fact closed,” she rejoined, “but these are our Christmas and New Year regulars. Anyway you know we keep an open door for our friends – like yourself.”He remembered times he had been up there in Winter, when it was just him and his hosts. So that was agreed. He asked to arrive a week before Christmas to unwind, and immediately decided to leave the next day, spend a few days in Edinburgh and then cross to the hotel. He wanted to get away from the area where he was; there was nothing now to keep him.He packed two large cases, his walking boots and skis, phoned George as he usually did, and the next day left for Edinburgh.If he had expected a white Christmas he would have been disappointed. While it was frosty morning and evening, the weather was generally dry. When it was wet the precipitation.
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