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”“Semi-permanent modification to attraction matrix complete.” said the voice in my head.She plucked my pen out of my shirt pocket, briefly scribbling on a paper towel. “I'm John,” I said, as she stuffed the towel into my shirt pocket along with the pen. She dried herself with some paper towels and quickly dressed as I pulled my pants up. She unlocked the door, sticking her head out for a second, then took my hand and led me back into the store. We strolled toward the entrance, making small talk. Out in the mall concourse, she stood on tiptoe to give me a quick kiss and walked away.Peter was still sitting where I'd left him. A quick glance at my watch showed that less than ten minutes had passed. I must have had the king of all silly grins on my face as I rejoined Peter.“What the hell, man?” he said, looking at me like I'd grown an extra nose.“She, uh, needed her ashes hauled.” I stammered, still not quite believing what had just happened.“I'll bet she did.” he replied, grinning. “Where would I find five or six guys? I can’t ask anybody from work. They all know you, and they know you’re my sister.”Helen frowned at that. “Can’t you think of something?”“Helen, don’t you think this is a little weird? And maybe even more than a little dangerous? What if somebody recognizes you? Omaha isn’t that big of a city.”“We’ll just do it one time. Then it’ll be out of my system. I swear.”I sighed. “Fine, I’ll see what I can do.” I finally cooked up a scheme that might work. Since I was a reasonably well-qualified bookkeeper, I decided to get a part-time job over the holidays. I found a machine shop whose bookkeeper was out on maternity leave. I told them I’d get them through the first of the year, but that someone else would have to do their year-end books. They agreed. The machine shop was perfect. For one, it was in a part of town that was totally unfamiliar, so the odds of seeing anyone we’d know were low. Second, it was filled with robust young men (and a few rusty old.
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