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I felt compelled tofind a way to casually go over to that area of the room to 'get a betterlook' at him. And so, having made an excuse in my mind, I decided to goover to the rack of books nearer to where he was sitting. Funny, thebooks on this rack were about hypnotism. No way did I believe inhypnotism. But, having my mental excuse for moving over to this side ofthe library, I acted interested. So I pulled a book off the shelfrandomly and proceeded to sit opposite him. I pretended to be engrossedin the book, but stole glances at him often. I noticed he was reading abook called "Control, through Hypnotism". There is no such thing ascontrol through hypnotism! I didn't care, he was absolutely handsome andone of the hottest guys I had ever seen in my life. I was giving the book I pulled as much attention as I could whilestealing glances at him, I didn't notice that he also was checking meout. I think at one point he made a comment about the book I was lookingat, and I just smiled and. Not the world around you, not the cars going by. Sometimes it’s just you and him and the rain. That’s how I felt that day.I hung up the phone, pretending things were normal. ‘Dad said he’ll be another hour. And I told him that I’ll get sommore shopping done but I think I’m skint!’‘Well, Jude, maybe we can spend time together that will be a Chrimbo present for you. Want to leave?’Thumpthumpthumpbzzzbzzzbzzz goes my heart again. ‘Of course. I’m baking in here it’s getting much too hot.’ We left, our fingers gently yet tightly interweaving. It felt so damn good to have a man hold my hand. I felt the roughness of labour yet the softness of love and intimacy and adoration. This must be one of my erotic dreams where everyone is so perfect, so willing and unselfish. I pinch my breasts to make sure this is real, yes it is the sensation drives me wild and people look at me pecularily (that’s my sodding luck!).David and I cross the street. Strangely, there is a vacant building, well it’s not.
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