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And now, all I can do is be here and hope that I can somehow, eventually, undo what I did."I turned away, speaking softly over my shoulder. "I'm not sure that's possible."I saw him nod in my peripheral vision. "I'll be waiting. Just in case."I walked away without another word. I went straight to my tent, crawling in and collapsing on my bedroll. I barely managed to unbuckle my chest piece before I passed out.I didn't hear anything for the rest of the night, but my subconscious must have been listening, because when the song I'd chosen was played in the tent next to mine, it haunted my dreams. I couldn't remember the images when I woke, but the melody of Shania Twain's "It only hurts when I'm breathing" was stuck in my head.Hope life's been good to you since you've been gone I'm doin' fine now - I've finally moved on It's not so bad - I'm not that sadI'm not surprised just how well I survived I'm over the worst, and I feel so alive I can't complain - I'm free againAnd it only hurts. I tried to resist, but I knew I would end up on a gay hook-up app my first evening there. I’m 22, quite slim, and straight. I say ‘straight’, I have a girlfriend, but now and then I get an urge for something more, something she can’t give me. It’s only happened a few times, but these out-of-town business trips always get me craving some fun. I came back from my first day with the client, grabbed a few beers out the fridge, watched some TV and then loaded up the app. What the hell?! There was only 5 people within 10 miles of my location. And i’d already drank a few beers so driving wasn’t an option. Damn I wish i’d have taken the client in the city. Four out of the five profiles messaged me pretty much straight away. They were obviously desperate for fresh meat. Three of them weren’t my type. Too young, too feminine, too creepy. I love fucking girls but when I stray to the gay side I want a real man, and it looked like the fourth guy had potential. “DadBod46”. His pic was a nice.
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