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. really, no. But I will not try to contact you." Jim, have you forgiven Petra? You won't allow yourself to resent me and the way I hid my condition from you, that I had to leave you. But you are bitter toward Petra because she pushed us together, and didn't tell you I could get ill. Jim ... would you rather not have had the time we did have? Would it have been better not to have loved, and be loved?"Her expression somehow managed to be serene, and loving and warm, questioning and stern all at once. She didn't rush me, but let me contemplate on her questions."No, sweetheart. I wouldn't have missed it for the world. The pain was terrible, but the joy was worth every moment." Jim, had I lived, we wouldn't have kept that intensity. Love is not like that. It would not have been less real or less powerful, but like a fire as it burns, it settles gradually into a steadier, deeper solid strength. If, when, you love again it will not be the same. You have great love in you, Jim. You need to. You know the one, like there is somethingdiffernt about the way your wife has been carrying herself or the way her pussyfeels or smells, just a tiny bit differnt then the way it normaly does, you know....like the times in the past when you used a condom for the lamest reasonsonly a new couple can come up with??? now days you dont give a shit becausewearing a piece of laytex or anything for that matter over you dick made sex feel like you were fucking a glass of warm water, but...it always made your womans pussy smell like laytex for the longest time, even after she showerd and cleand the damn thing out.But now that old but still familiar scent is back again and you havent toucheda Trojan since that time you banged that tweaker chick you met on Craigslist when your woman went out of town at the begining of the year to visit her familyand you had the house to yourself. but now you thought you caught the scent last night when you had your head halfway into her ovaries, and didnt her.
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