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The new owner, a firefighter, was no stranger to Anglo Saxon turns of phrase, but, Lawsey! This bird knew some curses!The firefighter tried reasoning with the bird, and, for his trouble, was invited to have carnal knowledge of a goat.He tried yelling at the bird, and was invited to worship at the altar of the Patron Saint of Fertility. With himself.Finally, the bird let loose with a blistering stream of invective, so loud, so profane, so scorching vulgar, that, in desperation, the firefighter seized the parrot, threw open the freezer, and tossed the squalling bird inside, slamming the door shut.The cursing and shenanigans continued for several minutes, until, abruptly, they ended. The man waited for a few more minutes, until, concerned, he peeked into the freezer, and beheld a silent, wide eyes bird scrunched up in one corner of the freezer.He withdrew the silent parrot, set him on his perch, and regarded the creature for a bit.“You think that you have finished swearing around me?”. "I'll figure it out tomorrow."What I failed to realize until it was to late that I was already walking to them. When I finally realized it that heavenly thrill came back in full force. One step turned into two. Three turned into four. Four into a jog! Five into a run! And what happened next was the most beautiful sight I've seen to date. Blade in hand I didn't simply slice the man with the guns throat. I put weight into the hit and dug in as far I could, watching as his blood sprayed out of his body bathed in the moonlight.I wished the other mans death would be just as beautiful as the first. But alas, I wanted to rip my blade from the guys throat so I could see what it would look like and see if it was just as gorgeous as the first spray of his blood. The man with the knife was just going to have to have an eye destroyed and his skull caved in. Maybe not as beautiful, but it got the job done."Ha. Haha. Hahahahaha!" I couldn't stop it if I wanted to. I just kept laughing as I walked.
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