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The three dropouts were breathing too hard to smile. 80 another two dropped out. By 95 only two left. At 100 only the winner was left and Chrissy smiled, “Wanna keep going?” He dropped at 115 and show off Chrissy did five more. “Roll over big guy, your prize is ready.” He had no wind to speak. “That was a fun contest. Hope losing to a girl won’t ruin your cred with the ladies. Hang on ... ah, oh god, yes ... I felt you finish.” She gave him a big kiss and offered her hand to help him stand. He took it and stood. “Shower is that way. We both need it.”Almost 20 people gathered in the third deck main bar. “I said ‘beer’ pointed to the group and the bar lady started filling mugs.” She asked what brought you all here together. “He won the prize in a pushup contest with 115 pushups.”“And I was the prize.” Chrissy offered with a smile.“Little Chrissy beat me with 120.”I don’t know if our lady barkeep helped when she said, “At least you beat a bunch of guys.”The lady with Andy said, “Andy. ”“Nope” the man replied “I know a secret: wheat bread. Eat lots of it and you can make love for hours. The second man dashed off to the nearest grocery store and bought eight loaves of wheat bread. At the checkout counter the cashier said “That’s a lot of bread. It will probably get hard before you’re done eating it all.”“Well, I’ll be damned” the man said. “Does everybody know about this but me?”Three bushies were sitting around a campfire one night when one bloke started complaining about his useless cattle dog.“I’d give $100 to anybody who can make him do anything on command” he spat. “Watch this.”The bloke commanded the dog to sit, roll over and play dead, all with no result.The second bushie said “Give me a go.” He commanded the dog to sit, roll over and play dead, all with no result. After an hour he gave up in disgust.The third bushie stands up and says “I’ll take that $100.” Then he grabs the dog, throws him into the campfire and yells “Get out of there, boy!”Three old guys.
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