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There was even a swimming pool and gymnasium, with a runningtrack. There was interaction between the women and the young boys in thecamp. The women were of course all transformees. A number of them hadbecoming intimate with the camp inmates. Even a few children had beenconceived and born. It was society's new method of controlling aberrantbehaviour with a system of reward and punishment. If the boys didn'tbehave they didn't get any sex. It was found that this method of controlwas actually working. It was teaching a new sense of responsibility tootherwise unruly and uncontrollable individuals. So it was to this campthat the majority of us would go in seven days time. Out of fifty-fiveof us "girls" who had been rescued fifty of us would go there. This waswhere our resident midwife Juliet now lived.The next few days just flew by. We were all still having erotic dreams.We were also expected to fill in a daily record of our erotic nightlyencounters. This gave the authorities an idea of. I was everything all at once. Yet I was nothing, I was standing in an empty room, dressed in my Habit, all alone, no one to hold me, to tell me how nice I felt, how good I was at sex. No one but God was watching me. Seeing me degrading my self, my vows, my Order. I knew the difference between masturbation and this lustful, gut drenching sexual hunger I had. Masturbation is something to help with the strain and stress and the natural sexual desires we all have once and a while. What I have is not normal; it is not the natural sexual desires. And for that I am ashamed. After I climax, I want to hide, to hang my head in shame. I vowed to never have sex. Yet, I long for the feel of it, I long for the moment I will ever experience what it will be to have sex with a man.Hear that? I guess I feel it is going to happen. Not that it is a fantasy, not that it is something that could possibly happen. No, I am talking as though I know it is going to happen. On top of that I am thinking like that.
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